This is an excellent way of conveying the way in which one is gradually undermined, without beign aware of that occurring. In the relationship with David S - I had no interest in him, beyond the fact of hi s connection to someone I admired (he was the younger brother of her best friend at Uni). This connection was used to weasel himself into my life and friendships - all under the guise of being caring and helpful. UGH... eventually his true colours shoed. - of entitlement and intent to dominate and control, along with his racist mindset. When I eventually left him, he presented himself as the victim and told everyone I had used him! Absolute reversal of the truth...