My thoughts on that are that I really don't think it is fair on yourself to feel guilt Lola. There's a vast combination of forces pressing in on us as we work flu-time, and manage so many other demands adn stresses on our lives - much of what we do, is the result of societal forces.

I find I learn about a place, and its history/politics/language etc, on meeting someone who wants to share those aspects /dynamics that influenced them and they respond to my curiosity.

People have a way of conveying what is permissible to explore and the questions we can ask - so it is a two-way process.

He surely conveyed nonverbally the boundaries of what you were to explore with him and you responded to that, because that is generally speaking, the respectful thing to do.

What matters is what we do when we are informed about a situation of horrible injustice and you are making your contribution assiduously and in a principled way.

Many others are shying away and keeping silent as they fear losing an income or being cancelled. You are not, so bravo!