As a little girl, I grew up with a mother who was 5'2" and morbidly obese. I was a tall, skinny kid, taking after my father. She’d battled her weight her entire life, yet turned the weight topic into my problem. She would comment how there was something wrong with me since I was so thin. One time she took me to the doctor and asked him what was wrong with me and if I had “worms.” He told her I was normal and that I’d fill out when I became an adult.
It's an absolute tragedy how many mothers project their insecurities and self-hatred onto their daughters in one way or another !
Mary Daly used the term, 'pre-possession' to describe how under patriarchy, women are often not not very well nurtured , not mothered and so are more liable to get possessed by patriachal norms. Thus male dominance gets embedded deeper, from one generation to the next, with men inventing notions of female beauty that shift and fluctuate in rediculous ways, from season to season, and decade to decade. Dr Daly's views on American gynaecology are also so relevant to the ways science and medicine are in service to male dominance and the fashion industry ie capitalism. Dr Daly's, ideas, (she was a philosopher and theologian), should be in the school curriculum under social studies or philosophy.!
Imagine what a source of strength that could be for girls whose mothers are weakened and who cannot nurture their daughters and psychologically we are prey to al sorts of manipulations by individual males, seeking control.