Thank youfor replying in detail... I wasn't really serious about the 'mad' imputation! I wonder if you have come across the Canadian psychologist Gabor mate? he has some very insightful things to say about addiction and trauma. Please look him him - there are quite a lot of lectures of his /conversations on You tube. He's got the degrees but not academic , more... wise and sincere and compassionate and honest.

I think the truth about men (from all patriarchal societies) is so ugly that most women cannot face it; coercion, manipulation and rape are all normalised and even when violence is acknowledged, from the male, societal forces from media to religion and everything in between, usually declare it's the woman's fault for provoking the male/failing to fulfill his needs.

No, it's absolutely not a lack of emotional awareness - they are getting a sense of power and pleasure through deliberately hurting you. That's simply nasty and sadistic - the person hardly deserves to be called human. No excuses, just get the F away !

Sadly, you are right about that... I see the West as an entity that over the past 500 years, has rewarded greed and psychopathic behaviour through creating an entire system of societal/economic and legal structures such that anyone who seeks to be fair and compassionate in their dealings with others, is defined as a loser who deserves to be taken advantage of. Other societies had their class of greedy, power-seeking exploiters, but their moral compass did not collapse such that viciousness is redefined as say, efficiency and then, is seen as acceptable and even appluaded by the majority.